Saturday, August 4, 2012

Jon and Kate Gosselin Reconciliation Deal in Works

Jon Gosselin has finally hit rock bottom. It is being reported he can’t pay his rent. This is the break Kate Gosselin has been waiting for to get the entire Gosselin clan back on television and making enough money to live the lifestyle she has become accustomed to. After all, she and everyone else knows the only reason anyone tuned into the original Jon and Kate Plus 8 was to watch Kate run roughshod over Jon every week.

While some of us have our opinions on exactly how Jon reached this point, we all pretty much agree that if turtle farmers in Louisiana can get their own reality show, then surely the Gosselin clan can rise out of the ashes to gain the top spot on reality television--that is if Jon is finally desperate enough to swallow his pride, beg Kate to take him back, and allow himself to be emasculated once again on national television.

 While Dr. Phil, with whom the Gosselins have met a few times, thinks a reunion show is a terrible idea, that doesn’t seem to be stopping the pair from doing anything in their power, regardless of how damaging it may be to the family as a whole, in order to earn some much needed revenue to save the family homestead.

Sources close to both mama and papa Gosselin say there may just be a deal before the fall season and, in fact, if it were to be announced today, that is all anyone would be talking about, indicating that there is still quite a bit of excitement surrounding a resurrection of Jon and Kate Plus 8—to be named “The Reconciliation.”

If that’s true, what do you suppose we’d be seeing in the upcoming episodes? Here’s a clue:

Kate decides the family should try turtle farming.

Jon settles into his favorite chair and plays Gran Turismo 2 while Kate screams at the kids who are outside trying to catch turtles.

Kate feeds the kids lunch.

Kate yells at the nannies.

Kate fires the nannies.

Kate finds dirt in the corner of Jon’s bathroom.

Jon takes a break from his game to complain to the camera crew that Kate is mean.

The kids fight with each other.

Kate fights with Jon.

Kate fights with the kids.

The kids fight with the turtles.

The family goes on a picnic and someone eats Kate’s special “skinny” lunch. The day is ruined.

Bodyguard Steve Neild magically shows up with another “skinny” lunch to calm Kate down.

The turtles die.

The kids cry.

Final Episode. Kate threatens to give Jon his walking papers again, but leaves it hanging in case they are in need of money come next season. Jon buys a new Playstation3.

If the show does go into production, it is expected to draw millions in viewership and may just be the hottest show of the upcoming season. The only thing producers are waiting for is Jon to come crawling back to Kate and beg for her forgiveness, and for Kate to say yes. A generous salary advance for both of them for the first episode should pretty much clinch the deal.

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