Patriots for Pot Claim Rick Perry is Scary as Hell

Dilbert “Doobie” Warner, leader of the political action group “Patriots for Pot” says that he and other members are having a hard time getting their news lately because every time they turn on one of their favorite news channels, they see images of Texas Governor Rick Perry, and say that it’s scaring the living hell out of them.

“We’re just so freaked out by the dude, man,” claims Warner. “It’s like watching a reality series based on The Omen, only it’s freakin’ real reality, dude.”

Most people who smoke or have at least tried pot know that when getting high, audio and visual signals in the brain are generally heightened. For those who are not aware of this sensation, Doobie explains:


“It’s like this, man. You’re sitting on the couch smoking a doobie , and say you have the Tom and Jerry Show on television. I can’t tell you the mechanics of it, but let me just tell you, man, Tom and Jerry without pot are pretty funny, but when you’re high, they are like the funniest fu*king animals on the planet, man.”


Warner then went on to apply his analogy to Rick Perry. “Ok, so it’s like this, man. You’re sitting on the couch smoking a joint and the news comes on and they’re talking about some Texas dude running for President and then they show you what he looks like and you’re like ‘dude, that guy scares the sh*t outta me. Isn’t he like that dude from the movie The Omen? and your friends are like, ‘yah, dude, totally like get that dude outta my face, now, like wow, are you goofing on me or what?’ and you have to like change the channel all the time cause the pot is telling you the guy might come right out of the screen like in Poltergeist or something, man.”