Saturday, December 20, 2014

The Reality of a Santaless Christmas Hits Home for Gosselin Kids

“…there will be snow and mistletoe and presents under a tree…” but there won’t be a Santa. The former reality show kids from Kate (Gosselin) Plus Eight are staring down another Christmas without the big fat jolly elf sticking his nose in it.

“There won’t be a Santa, that’s the biggest thing,” said Kate, who made the rounds on the early morning news shows telling everyone proudly that she gave her kids a dose of reality long before they were stars in a reality show.

“There is no Santa, never was, and my kids knew this from the git-go,” said Kate. “They get presents, sure, I’m not that mean,” she said over and over again to convince everyone that she isn’t the Grinch folks make her out to be.”

Kate says she can’t help controlling all the aspects of Christmas though.

“They can make their lists out, but I decide what they get. It is just easier that way,” she said.

“I set a time for each of the kids to sit down and discuss their lists with me. I give them the whys and wherefores as to how ridiculous some of their requests are…” she interrupted herself saying “Have you seen the cost of a simple box of Play Doh these days?...” and then went on.

“We always settle on the pajamas and slippers that I bought at last year’s half-off after-Christmas sales,” offered the queen of cruelity TV.

Kate says it is a win-win for her. “The kids get a couple of presents and I shop at the same store for all of them.”

Kate then went on to explain that giving the kids fewer gifts this year sends them a powerful message. “It’s not about Santa and toys, it is about looking your best for photo ops,” and with that, Kate was off to have her hair re-woven for the holidays.

Jon Gosselin, whom Kate accused of being the real Grinch this year due to his inability to provide expensive tech gadgets for all his kids, couldn’t be reached for comment as his own iPhone service was evidently disconnected.

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