Local Woman Obsessed with Making Pancakes

Lois Reiner, from Hoboken, New Jersey, is a woman with one goal in mind--to make a pancake that bears the likeness of someone infamous. Reiner claims there is money to be made on eBay. Big money.

Her short list of who's who, which Reiner says would pull in the most money are Jesus, the Dalai Lama, or even Buddha, but non-religious persons such as Elton John, John Lennon, or even Sarah Palin or Barack Obama, she says, would more than likely net big gains as well.

Asked if she has been successful in her quest, Lois said, "Unfortunately, no, but I did get close once to making a pancake that bore the likeness of Jesus Christ, but upon closer inspection by my husband, Carl, it turned out looking more like a dugged-out hippie. I had to trash that one and quick," she said.

Her husband Carl, seemingly a bit irritated, said this about his wife's obsession,

"From the time she wakes up in the morning to well into the afternoon, Lois is making pancakes. I haven't counted, but I can assure you that we've gone through well into the hundreds of pounds of flour and eggs, not to mention oodles of gallons of milk, for this ridiculous pancake quest she's on."

Lois chimed in, "Yeah, well, you'll be sorry when I make my first million off one of these pancakes and leave your sorry butt behind."

Carl claims he hasn't had a decent breakfast (without pancakes), or lunch for that matter, for about three weeks now, and he's getting fed up (no pun intended).

Lois was asked if she has possibly tried strategically placing a couple of blueberries or chocolate chips in the pancakes to resemble eyes, and she answered "No. My pancakes are the real deal, unadulterated.

"If I did that, I don't think anyone would take me seriously as a pancake artist."

Meanwhile, Lois has admitted that she may have gone overboard with the pancakes, and plans on focusing next week on possibly trying grilled cheese sandwiches.

"I heard that a woman got almost $30K for a partially eaten grilled cheese sandwich that bore the likeness of Jesus Christ.

"Hell," said Lois, "for that kind of money, I'm willing to stand in that kitchen from morning to night making grilled cheese sandwiches."

Carl looked heavenward and said, "Thanks, Lord. At least we're moving on to lunch now."

Woman Sells Set of Dinosaur Cheese Puffs for $495 on eBay

Puffcorn Actual Size

UPDATE: Since purchasing these cheetos, the Donald has been elected and with his inadvertently making cheetos worth a ton of money, Helen has offered up the snack dinosaurs again on E-Bay for $500,000. Anyone interested, please go to E-bay to find the information. Just search for Donald Trump snacks known as the Trump-ets. Good luck.

Helen Crumples is almost $500 richer today after accepting the highest bid on eBay for her "dinosaur" cheese puff collection.

The set of five Chester's Puffcorn snacks, which look amazingly like miniature brontosauruses, were discovered by Helen while tidying up her son, Seth's room.

"I've joked a number of times that looking for anything in Seth's room is like going on an archaeological dig. Little did I know that I wasn't too far off the mark," said an elated Crumples.

Since accepting the offer on eBay, Crumples has bought several more bags of the cheesy snack, and has discovered that most of the puffs resemble either dinosaurs or swans.

"The jig is up, I guess," said Crumples unapologetically.

"I sure hate to break the news to the poor woman who bought my collection. She was such a nice old lady and so excited to have been the highest bidder. I just hope she doesn't think I swindled her."

Crumples did some checking and could find nothing in the eBay rules and regulations that says if a seller realizes the item they are selling is not as listed or not worth nearly what was bid, the seller has any obligation to refund a buyer's money.

Helen says she does feel a bit bad about the whole thing, though. In order to make it up to the buyer, Helen is sending a $25 gift certificate to the kindly old woman from Hobby Lobby.

Helen is hoping the woman, who claims to be an artist, might use the gift card to buy some fake palm trees and shrubs to make a nice diorama in which to show off the unique, or not so unique, puffs, which after realizing her mistake, are actually now only worth the $2.00 or so price of a bag of Chester's Puffcorn.

Iowa Man Makes Deal of a Lifetime on eBay

A Des Moines, Iowa man was the highest bidder on a 40' luxury yacht on the online auction site eBay.

Jon Q. O'Nasses, says he was at the right time at the right place and ready to make a deal, when he nabbed the luxury yacht for a mere $4000. Yes, you read that right, $4000 U.S. Dollars for a 40' luxury yacht.

The ship, named Miss Fortune, was placed for sale by its owner tarkington42, when he could no longer afford the monthly marina slip rental fee of $350 per month. The yacht is docked in Sarasota, Florida.

"I was so sad to let her go for that price," said tarkington, "but the marina rental was eating me alive, plus, the boat needs a complete engine overhaul."

While the engine overhaul wasn't mentioned on the description of the item as O'Nasses was bidding on it, he says he doesn't care if the entire boat needs an overhaul.

"I had a cool $12,000 in my savings account," said O'Nasses, "and I was willing to buy half the boat for half that amount. When I saw this come on the auction block starting at $500, I couldn't believe my eyes."

O'Nasses says he began bidding on the boat at 2 a.m. last Friday, believing he was never going to get a yacht for $6000, but luck was on his side and Miss Fortune turned his luck around when he realized a week later, as the auction came to a close, that he was the highest bidder at $4000.

Asked what a guy from Iowa is going to do with a yacht moored in Sarasota, Florida, O'Nasses replied "Well, first I'm going to fly down to Sarasota and check her out, then most likely, I'll start shopping around for bids to fix the engine.

"Once she's fixed, I'm thinking maybe I'll hire myself a seasoned caption and ask a couple of friends to accompany me on a trip to the Bahamas. Then, if that works out, who knows? I might even consider taking her across the ocean and bumming around the Greek islands for a few months."

Upon hearing this, his wife Jackie rolled her eyes, and told us, "He is a dreamer, a great big fat dreamer."