Trump After Realizing DOD Doesn't Stand for Dept. of Donald |
President-elect, Donald Trump resigned as President Monday,
shortly after arriving in Manhattan for a
briefing with the Department of Defense. Details are still coming in,
but some say the reason for his resignation has to do with a reading assignment
he was given shortly before the holiday break.
Mr. Trump was on his way to meeting with the DOD in the
wee hours Monday morning when advised by his advisor that he would be required
to answer questions relating to the information provided in the top secret
briefing memos.
Not one to shirk his responsibilities, the Donald fired
off a tweet that said "I know everything. I don't need a briefing to know
everything, but I'll go."
About two minutes into the briefing, Trump came out of
the room appearing confused and nonplussed. He agreed to a short 20-second
press briefing.
"I kept getting these e-mails from the DOD and I
wondered, 'why are they calling it DOD?' Then it dawned on me, they must be
talking about Department of Donald, and well, I already know what I know so why
should I read something that I know I know? But I decided, ok, I'll go just in
case there is something they might not know, and need me to clear things up for
them."
"Besides," he said, "they always serve the
best croissants at these breakfast meetings."
After the Donald spoke, a reporter whispered to Dennis
Rodman, who was standing beside Trump waving a N. Korean flag, and Dennis
whispered to Trump.
Seemingly unfazed, Trump then announced, "Well
folks, it appears DOD stands for Department of Defense. Who knew? You coulda
knocked me over with a comb. But that's ok, I'll just resign."
Turning to no one in particular, he added "I can do
that can't I? I mean, I don't have to be President if I don't want to do
I?"
While the question seemed rhetorical and just a tad
elementary, a reporter from NPR, who had been hiding in the back of the
briefing room the whole time in order to escape detection by the
President-elect, spoke up.
"No, Mr. Almost President, you don't."
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