Ashton Kutcher Claims He’d Be a Fantastic Model if He Weren’t Such an Awesome Actor

"Wait a sec, that isn't me" said Ashton Kutcher
as he was being congratulated on his wardrobe choice

Looking quite dashing in a turquoise blue velvet waistcoat and matching ascot the other evening while waiting for the attendant to bring his car around, we took the opportunity to ask Ashton Kutcher if he ever considered becoming a model instead of an actor.

“Why, no, not officially,” was Kutcher’s answer. “But now that you mention it, I’m sure I would make one fantastic model if it weren’t for my awesome acting career.”

One has to agree that people like Ashton Kutcher have more talent in their little pinky than most of us do in our index and ring fingers combined. Kutcher seemed happy for the opportunity to discuss just how talented he is.

Without prompting, he continued “Why, I’ll bet you if I put my mind to it, I could even sing opera. I have a feeling that if I weren’t such a darned good actor, I’d probably be appearing right now at the Metropolitan Opera House,” he said, unable to mask his self-adoration. “Of course, I don’t really like opera all that well, but I guess I could stomach it if that’s what my fans wanted.”

Reflecting further, the unabashed celebrity told us that he would love to try his hand at painting as well, or photography, but that once he created his first masterpiece, he’d be so busy keeping up with the demand for his art that he wouldn’t be able to audition for upcoming parts in television shows.

“It is just a matter of time before Two and a Half Men films its last episode,” said Kutcher, “and then I’ll be in such high demand that I just couldn’t see myself doing anything other than starring in films, television ads, and plays. I am just that incredible,” he said. “But thanks ever so much for asking.”